Just some thoughts

For some strange reason, I have a tendency to focus on the wrong people. Wait, it's not a strage reason at all...it's because I'm scared. See, I focus on and try to build friendships/relationships with people who aren't on the same wavelength as I am. But the people who understand me are the people that I put my guard up around. I think I do that because they will be able to see through all the walls, facades, and sarcasm that I have constructed around myself and made into the public Michelle. It's funny how you know exactly what you want, but when you're presented with it, you don't accept it. You restrain yourself. Or at least that's what I do. It's one of my many character flaws....It's been said that "you have not, because you ask not," but what happens when you ask and you get it, but you throw it away? Yeah....I don't know either, but I'm going to be real transparent right now: I made a decision that I didn't want to make, and that doesn't sit well with me. I don't know if it was the best decision, and past experiences have me wondering whether or not it will stick. And just between me, you, and the rest of the blogging world, I _______ _______ _ _____ __ __. Yeah.....

Do I and Why

I have some questions,
Maybe you can help me learn a new lesson....
Do I have "Sex Me" written on my face?
Why do you ignore my sweetness and grace?
Do I look like your personal doormat?
Wait, I forgot...women shouldn't say things like that.
I'm just wondering why,
Your hands always fall to my thighs.
You say you want to be friends
Yet you try to "get in the panties" again....AND AGAIN.
Why can't you see the intelligence behind my smile,
And that my sincerety alone makes me worthwhile?
I want to be more to you than just a release...
I want to be that place where all your worries cease.
Let me show you my potential and aspirations.
Let me be more than just a sweet sensation.
I don't know why you won't let me in,
Or why your only desire is to be with me in sin.
I was just wondering if you could tell my why, and Do I...